Petone burns!

Some stinking bastard arsonist has been at work in my fair suburb. Looks like they've caught him. I thought I'd reassure you that we didn't see any fire here.

We did however see a couple of young people giving each other the bash outside our house on Saturday evening. I had to call the police, it was all very dramatic.

Don't tell anyone about this crime wave please. We want house prices to continue rising.