Friday, August 31, 2007

De-lurk alert

Melissa has given away some lovely prizes for her readers who have de-lurked and said hi. I am not quite so lovely as Melissa, but I am offering some gruts - style of your choosing - as a prize for commenting on this post.

I'll make the draw using a random number generator, because I believe that sounds most sci-fi and futuristic, and here at Wanda Harland we are all about the future.

There are Lady Pants and Man Pants to choose from, as well as adulation. You may enter as many times as you like. And I suppose if you're a completely selfless type person, you could have shirt for your kiddiwinkle if you want.

I'll do the draw on Tuesday. This is VERY EXCITING.

Update: I should add that non-lurkers are also warmly invited to enter, nay, ENCOURAGED to enter.

Thursday, August 30, 2007


Sometimes I forget to write, and sometimes I'm a bit busy. Today was a combination of both.

It has been good busy, some making money busy, and then lots of hanging out with great people busy. Since the people probably don't want to be talked about (non-bloggers!), I'll talk about the food and grog.

I've had:
Freshly roasted almonds
Havarti and water crackers
Sauvignon Blanc
Warmed, marinated olives
Marinated feta
Garlic bread
Blue cheese and figs
Affogato with Galliano

And now I'm happy, full, socially satisfied and sleepy.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Ain't nothin' going on but the rent

I've been reclining since lunchtime. My dodgy stomach hit again. Ah well, prior to the ache I spent the morning scoffing scones and having a lovely chat, so it wasn't a wasted day.

I've been doing business from my bed. To be frank, this is my ideal locale, and I imagine when the kids are both at school I'll be hard pressed to find a better spot to work. It is sunny, comfortable and very handy should I feel like changing my outfit or having a nap.

I haven't had so much time to mooch on the computer for a while, and bloody good thing it is. I keep finding things to buy, and not good things that will make my business grow and increase my wealth, but bad things that will make my house pretty and my mortgage huge. Latest find is this divine set of cutlery THAT I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED and I'm certain we need. It is 40% cheaper than in NZ, and you know when you make savings like that, they're virtually giving you money.

I'm not one to turn down free money now, am I?

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Take a bullet for me

My favourite bullet point stylie reportage on life.

  • Busy. Man, when does that change?
  • Gonna be on ASB Business at some ungodly hour, some time in the next week, being dorky.
  • My phone is dead, and I suspect the charger is in Taupo.
  • My house is very tidy (thanks to aforementioned tv thing), and very painted.
  • The dog is losing bits of herself today, and will come back unable to conceive. Choice. Hopefully she'll be sleepy for a day or two as well, so we get a breather from puppy-mayhem.
  • The Great Blend is on Thursday. I'm unable to make it, but you definitely should.
  • I haven't had lunch and my mind is wandering.
  • Our coffee machine is on the blink, so we bought a new plunger to tide us over, I love it. It is the Columbia, can't get linky to linky proper.
  • Child on me. Too much boring info in post already. Will go.

Monday, August 27, 2007

INXS Monday

This came on the radio in the car when we were away, and I was once again amazed that INXS had so many hits.

My friend Cro always loved them, for me it is nostalgia that makes me like them, because they kind of passed me by at the time. And the fact Michael Hutchence is/was hot. I am that shallow.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

I'm back, and I'm bad

We went to Taupo. It was very spur of the moment, we wanted to go away, we wanted to show the children snow, and so Taupo won. We stayed at an amazing holiday house. I am very smitten with . Every time we've stayed in one, they have been fabulous, this one was no exception. I knew I loved it the minute I walked in and saw the delicious retro wallpaper in the kitchen - the place was gorgeous. It got even better when we woke in the morning and took in the view. Spectacular doesn't begin to describe it.
Acacia Bay

We went up to Wai o Tapu to check out the geothermal activity. Lovely place.
Devil's milkshake (or something that caused me to have to explain the concept of 'devil')
And we watched a dam somewhere fill a river somewhere, and we went up to Whakapapa to check out the snow. Next year we'll ski, but Malo is still a bit little. I've never seen the Chateau before, and it was coooool. If I was someone else, and getting married, I'd go there, and invite me. Someone, please, heed my call.

What else? We went to Tokaanu to check the hotpools out, but SOMEONE left my togs and towels behind, so we ended up going to DeBretts instead, which wasn't as good, but still nice and warm.

Highlight of the holiday was going on a fishing charter with the lovely man, Jim, who owns the bach we stayed in, and also happens to run a charter business. We caught a few trout, they were all little and had to be sent back. I didn't mind, the novelty of reeling in those suckers was splendid, and Jim basically did all the boring stuff and let us mooch around and pull in the fish. We went to see the Maori rock carvings.
Maori Rock Carvings (Taupo)
And we returned home to a painted house, which is very lovely and very relaxing.

Now I have to go and freak out about being interviewed for the telly. Cor.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Out of here dudes

I'm on holiday!

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Ohmigod, then I found this

I knew every bloody intonation of every singer when this little puppy came out.

The 80s was so full of earnestness - We Are the World bring it on - and please note how the only vaguely hip person was Brucie, and he rocked it baby, and imagine if Michael Jackson had stopped the surgery then, and now I understand why I feel the way I do about Bob Dylan. That is all I am saying.

U Can't Touch This Sunday

When U Can't Touch This first came out, I hated it. I've probably hated it until about 10 minutes ago, when I found it for Finn on YouTube, because he is doing a dance for it at school. Man! That MC Hammer could dance. I imagine I was blase about it when I was young because some crazy part of my mind imagined I might be able to dance like that when I grew up. Well, I can't.

So, for the children, people. Show them this video, get them the pants, and teach them to dance like the Hammer. We may never dance, but the children are our future. Let us show them the way, show them all the beauty they possess inside (I'm feeling a nauseatingly cheesy Sunday coming on for next week).

Craft2.0 was a fabulous success. I was visited by so many people, and it was a complete pleasure. I started making a big list of each person, and it would have taken me a bloody week to linky poo everyone, but to all of you, thanks for coming and saying hello! It was a huge day in all respects - complete sensory overload. You'll be relieved to know I did some excellent shopping, and I'm blinged up to the nines, my body is scrubbed, and we're enjoying our coffee from some lovely new cups.

I took the chiddlers to the Simpson's movie this morning. I liked it, especially the first 24 minutes, which I suspect is directly related to the fact that my attention span for the Simpsons is exactly one episode. The kids managed to keep reasonably still, although I had to resort to evil burger bribes halfway through to keep Malo quiet.

I joined a group on Facebook called "If 100,000 people join, my wife will let me name my second child Spiderpig". I love some of the names of groups on Facebook. I'm sorely tempted to join "I learned all of my life lessons from The Smurfs". Of course the Spiderpig group was a joke. There are crazy people around, and plenty that want to name their child ACDC, but in this instance it was an excellent experiment in viral internets, I loved all the "you are sick, nobody should call there (sic) kid Spiderpig)" comments (have you ever seen the comments on YouTube?). Ka pai, I say.

Friday, August 17, 2007

Less than 24 hours!

Craft2.0 kicks off tomorrow at TheNewDowse (the least fun to type name in the world) in Lower Hutt. It will be a festive, fun-filled fiesta. Come say hello, buy a shirt or a pair of Hutt Man Pants, you know you want them...

How to be a domestic goddess #1

People, I do not only mix martinis, today I am making granola. This stuff is like crack, or P (lets localise the drug). We ate the last lot by the handful, it is very yummy. The recipe is here, and it is worth making. I didn't like it with the raisins, but if you like raisins, you should go for them. I think it is pretty good without.

You can vaguely pretend it is healthy ("granola" has such an earnest ring to it), but don't kid yourself, it is probably as good for you as a packet of Anzac biscuits for brekkie.

Big ups to the intrepid cook Ange for sussing out great recipes. I did try one of her other muesli experiments, but I think the granola is the winner.


Bloody money. I love money, and I loved the NZ$ being high, even though it was a guilty pleasure and bad for exporters yada yada. Although Fonterra didn't seem to be suffering.

And now all my exciting plans for spending precious kiwi pinga overseas have been shattered. It sucks.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

When I groweded up

Mostly I don't need to feel like anything much has changed in my life. You know, I've had some kids, but truth be told, they like faffing around, doing pretty much the same shit as me. We run around the park, go on the swings, beg to eat at McDonald's, get denied stuff, try and sneak lollies, laugh a lot, watch rubbish telly, play on the computer, harass the dog, dance around the lounge. I start begging for martinis at 4.30pm, they start asking to eat.

Today though, it all changes. Today we're going to school for our first parent/teacher interviews. And I'm the parent! I'm bloody hoping we don't get told of for nuffin, 'cos this is one situation where the buck stops here.

Wish me luck.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Bullet point MAYHEM

I loves me a bullet point.

  • Listen to this. It comes via Tom, and is crack for the ears. Go on.
  • Craft2.0 rocks this Saturday. Here is my friend Rachelle in the paper about it, if you squint you can see my name too.
  • Facebook has been crappy lately, which has been a good chance to ease my addiction.
  • I had a leisurely bag filling (goodie bags for Craft2.0) evening planned. What does that mean? Completely inundated with orders, of course.
  • Big bags of liquorice allsorts from Moore Wilson's will kill you.
  • So will big bags of jaffas.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Status reports

Martha is missing Facebook at the moment (it seems to be down).

Martha is surprised how much she wants to update her status.

Martha is happy to have made the Babylicious blog reappear, albeit completely empty.

Martha is looking forward to a quiet moment tomorrow to watch Big Love.

Martha is going to sleep.

Nominate a milf

I get an outlandish amount of hits for people looking for milfs. One today arrived from Italy, and they'd even searched "Martha milf" - I hope they were satisfied.

So what better opportunity to boost my ratings, than give you an opportunity to nominate your top milf. I think Stifler's mother wins hands down, but I require your suggestions to be real mums. Posh? The Queen? Olivia Newton John? Knock yourselves out.

Monday, August 13, 2007

8 Random Things

Nicola has tagged me with 8 random things. I haven't done a meme for a squazillion years, and I suspect I have no random things left to say, but I'll give it a punt.

1. Geez this is hard, given I write random facts about myself every day, I feel somewhat self conscious doing it in this format.

Umm. My hangovers have always been a lot worse than I deserve. Even when I was young I'd feel really seedy after a couple of glasses of wine. This probably indicates I should stop drinking, but in fact I think it stops me drinking more often, so works perfectly really.

2. If I won lotto today, I'd buy a Michael Parekowhai picture immediately.

3. I'm a silver person, or white gold, or ideally platinum.

4. I have 4 new coats this winter. An outrageous amount, but they're all great.

5. I keep saying I'm going to start keeping my age a secret, but I never do. Problem is, I keep thinking my age sounds quite young.

6. I always have sundried tomato cream cheese on a sesame bagel at Wholly Bagels.

7. I like gardening a lot. I especially enjoy pulling weeds out of the lawn.

8. I'm going to do a marketing paper next year at Massey. I suspect I should've done marketing *mutter* years ago when I first went to university, but for some reason I did arts. Sadly this has given me too much affection for buying pictures (see no 2).

I tag you all. Every one of you.

Like Posh innit?

Like Posh innit?
Originally uploaded by Wanda Harland
I find this pic about the creepiest one I've ever taken of myself. Blame the Mac, it has a mind of its own, and I'm fairly confident is out to take over the world.

I don't look as much like Posh Spice in the picture as I would like, my hair is quite pleasingly Posh 2 cuts ago. I suppose to look a bit more Posh I'd have to shed at least half my body weight, and then have it pumped back onto my chest.

I had the haircut yesterday, and I am renewed and invigorated. Obviously I'm quite shallow, because for me it doesn't take a week at a Buddhist meditation centre to have a feeling of wellbeing, it simply takes a visit from the divine Ms Selena.

If anyone needs a good hairdresser, contact me and I'll hook you up.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Saturday - it is from within the last decade!

I listened to the Phoenix Foundation's Horsepower when I was in labour. I still like it. The same cannot be said for the Beta Band, listening to them takes me right back to that hideous delivery suite. I guess I must've had more of the gas when I was listening to Phoenix Foundation. May I recommend that gas? I don't know what it is, but it gives one all the properties that usually it takes 3 hours at the pub to attain.

I love many of the Phoenix Foundation songs. Many. I love this one too.

Friday, August 10, 2007

Then it changes...

Malo starts kindy on Monday. Suddenly I'm not really a full time mother (although I was never particularly convincing at that, given my prolific blogging and working habits).

I'm mainly excited. He'll love it, and I'll have some time during the day to work, rather than cramming it all into the evenings. It may even offer the chance for me to do some serious business growing - the possibility of getting on the phone and calling retailers without sounding like a zoo is pretty amazing.

We went into town this morning for one of our coffee dates, and took my father with us. We went to Dorothy Patisserie on Cuba St, a place I've found excellent in the past. My father went up to the counter to get some chocolates for my mother, but blanched a bit when he saw the range of novelty chocolates (think boobs and penniths). Dorothy! Why hast thou forsaken me? You were going to be my classy bakery to take Oy Vey, and now you're a chocolate fetishists dream.

Thursday, August 09, 2007


Mr Timberlake is playing in Auckland. I would like to go pleeze. I don't know why, apart from the fact he is kind of handsome, and I think it would be a helluva show.

In honour of the man, here is the marvellous Dick in a Box. I'm sure at least 2 of you haven't seen it yet.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Could it be the most beautiful Mac in the world

As if there isn't enough temptation in this world already, check these babies out. And they're very reasonable.



I need a break, mate. Life is busy as a busy thing.

Craft2.0 is on next weekend, and should be a total blast, and I'm thinking after that we hit the road. Cannot wait.

Ideas welcome, I'd like to take in some snow and I'd also like to be warm. Easy ask eh?

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Why my hair smells pretty (and other bits of me too)

Originally uploaded by ellipse
Work has gone pretty nuts over the last week or so - beginning of the month stuff - and I've been flat out with orders for shops.

This meant I couldn't make it to the Hustle for Autism last night. A real shame, it sounded great (better than sitting here making invoices and trying to get my GST return to work).

I sent Glen along instead, with instructions not to hold back at the auction. And he delivered. This basket of goodies was like christmas, filled to the brim with nice smelly stuff, and nail stuff and eye stuff. I should start doing product reviews of everything. Currently my hair is Amplified with something, and satined with something else, my body is cocooned with something creamy and my nails are kind of peachy coloured.

It was freaky expensive, but all for a good cause, so everyone wins ;-)

Monday, August 06, 2007

Morning o' fun

I'm a big fan of airports. Love 'em. I love them when I'm travelling, and I love meeting people arriving. Departures are not so good, but still, they're a fabulous opportunity to do a bit of people watching and coffee drinking.

The boys and I went to pick up my parents today. They've been in France and Japan for 5 weeks. We made sure we arrived nice and early so we could get some (frankly terrible) sushi, coffee, fluffies and muffins from Fuel. Wishbone gets my pick for food, but Fuel coffee can't be beat.

We mooched around, picked up and put down some books, saw some cops escort a guy through the airport who was unnervingly hairless and had an open shirt on, saw lots of people who looked vaguely familiar (hello, Wellington!), used the fabulous Parent's Room (if you have kids, you need to check it out - clean and empty), gazed at the 102 inch screen.

And then we had the pleasure of welcoming my parents back. They always come with lashings of nougat, duty free, toys and clothes for the kids.

Now I'm planning my next trip to the airport. Hopefully it will involve passports and tickets and a long time away, now I need a dart and a map...

Update: This must be the guy! Chur Hadyn.

Sunday, August 05, 2007

Cheesy Sunday

Many years ago I was very lucky to be able to go to a Gary Barlow record company schmooze thing - who is Gary Barlow? Well, he was the REAL talent in Take That, but unfortunately wasn't the best looking... I think he tried flying solo, but his bandmate Robbie captured the limelight.

There was a point in my life when I used to go out a lot (yes, even more than now), and invariably I'd come home and blast this piece of schlock to the world. Sorry Austin St!

Hustle for Autism

The Hustle for Autism in on tomorrow (Monday) at the San Francisco Bathhouse. Babylicious have donated a voucher, and the Craft2.0 posse are donating a huge selection of cool things for the auction.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

I'm full of swear words UPDATE! Cleaned up for the sake of my old dad, who is coming back from France tomorrow, and can't hack the swearing words ;-)

I can't stop swearing. Every word that sprouts from my mouth is prefixed with "jeepers". Oy.

I'm as hungover as you can be without being a little bit dead.

Last night I started the evening with Wellingtonista drinkies at corporate headquarters. It was an early start, and a long night. Spidey!. Lollylicking holy moly.

Um, so we started at the Herd St Brasserie (I'm not linking to anything today because of the hungoveredness), the Wellintonistae split and I hung out with some other awesome dudes and went to the the-atre and watched J w-lea do Marlene. To be honest, I have the attention span of a newt, so theatre is really not my gig. She was good, and everyone raved, but my mind was wandering a little. At half time I had to run back to the Herd St Brasserie to retrieve my wallet, and I pilfered a lemonade off a couple of theatre goers, so not only did I have the attention span of a newt, but I also had the moxy of a freaking 16 year old. Running and fizzy drinks! Dur.

Then we went to Boulot. I had an excruciatingly embarrassing fall off my very high stool, and now my derriere feels a little like a big bruise. I drank way too many clean martinis, and today my mouth feels like the lower end of an olive barrel. Fortunately I had the hindsight to go to bed fully dressed, so the onerous business of choosing clothes has been eliminated from my day.

Thursday, August 02, 2007


Lovely Blogs wants you.

Lovely Blogs is a chance to pimp your own ride, be the cherry on your cake, take the bull by the horns, kill two birds with one stone, count your chickens before they hatch, save nine with a stitch in time, roll and gather no moss and many other totally irrelevant moral ditties.

Go there, send in the questionnaire, and join the ranks of the fabulous. It will make you better looking and live longer.

Disclaimer: some or all of the above may not apply to you.

Another title.

I went out AGAIN last night, to a bloggers meet. It was fun, and funny, and I'm waiting for someone else to write about it so I don't have to do all that linky stuff, because it takes ages, and I'm not that way inclined.

Two outings in a single week is a bit of a record for me, but get this, I'm going out again tomorrow. Three times. My cup runneth over.

And because of that bloody running over cup, I'm mental at the minute. I've been firing off replies to the freaking fab people I went to school with who have added me on Facebook, and it is fair to say they'll probably take protection orders out against me. I've been raving. It is that perfect diet of not much food, quite a bit of booze and coffee - the very same one that got me through 3ish years of university - you might say it made me the person I am today.

See what I mean about the raving?

Update: Bless Mauricio for having the energy to be linky, so I don't have to.
Here is the post about last night's gathering.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Kickin' arse

I went out last night, to the pub. Cripes! It was the Wellingtonista Quiz night, and we kicked some serious arse. First I kicked some Pinot, then some gin, then some Laphroiag... now I'm kicking some cups of tea.

We did win, which was amazing, but not surprising. Our team was full of talent and eye candy, and definitely worth ignoring a whole lot of work for...

And now I must return to filling orders.

In the meantime, ponder this (10 points if you know where that comes from):

What would you buy me if money were no object.

I'll admit. I got a bit stumped for a question, given my brain's slight fogginess today.